I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
