So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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