What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
