HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize