just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
