Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
