Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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