idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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