Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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