Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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