his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
