yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize