Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
