Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
