is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm sobbing to NWA
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
