just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
the raccoons are back...
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