i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize