Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Randomize
