Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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