Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
