it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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