Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
