Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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