He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
being pregnant is like rehab
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Randomize
