We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
