How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
You smell like stripper and shame
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
