They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
