It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Still dying that you shit outside
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
