is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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