Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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