How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
