i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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