he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
