is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
