Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Randomize
