this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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