I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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