Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
