Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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