loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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