And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
