Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(541): View more from Oregon

Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."

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(313): View more from Michigan

I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes

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(740): View more from Ohio

I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out

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(703): View more from Virginia

threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.

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(619): View more from California

woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.

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(248): View more from Michigan

about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.

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(760): View more from California

is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?

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(+49): View more from Germany

He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways

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