why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
i need some magic done to my vagina
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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