Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
