Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
