I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
