I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Randomize
