I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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