Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
