and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
