I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
