FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It's rum buckets o'clock
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
